So I've been reading a lot in the blogosphere about the book Bringing Up Bebe by Pamela Druckerman. I haven't read it, but it's about the differences between American parenting and French parenting. Now, I also have no plans to read it, because based on the reviews, it seems to me that the author has focused on a small (privileged) group of American parents and that French parents certainly don't corner the market on the types of things she talks about. Nor do I think she would come to Baltimore and see the things that I see everyday and still come to the same conclusions.
Nevertheless, one thing stood out to me: French children don't snack all day long like American children do, and French children eat their meals. I have no idea how much of that is actually true, since picky eating is developmentally normal no matter what your country of origin.
The thing I'm wondering is if this is even reasonable for American children. One late afternoon snack might work if we ate dinner late at night, but we eat dinner usually between 5 and 6PM and the kids are in bed no later than 8PM.
If I had to eat three meals and one snack and that was it, I'd be starving and chewing my own arm off. My days tend to be long. Plus, I exercise 5 days a week and really need to refuel after a workout. Speaking for myself only, if I get to the point where I'm starving, I tend to stuff myself and make less healthy choices. So when I go to work, I fill my bag with small healthy snacks that I can eat between appointments or surgeries. A hardboiled egg, or a whole wheat mini bagel with peanut butter or a bag of grape tomatoes. Especially on days when we're busy and I don't get to eat my actual lunch until wayyyyyy past lunchtime, I depend on those snacks to keep me going.
As for the kids, Maureen is and always has been a good eater. She eats healthy foods, and she is hungry nearly every 60 to 90 minutes. Her usual eating schedule looks something like this:
715AM--Breakfast--oatmeal with cinnamon, or whole wheat pancakes, sometimes a waffle and sausage and very rarely, a bowl of Cheerios
830AM-she starts asking for food again. It's 9 before I finally get her an applesauce pouch and a small cup of juice.
1030AM-she's hungry again, so I give her a string cheese.
1130--Lunch--one hardboiled egg, a bowl of yogurt, milk and some kind of fruit
1230--Preschool snack--fruit again, half a banana or a bag of grapes or apple slices.
3PM--After school snack. Both kids are starving by this point. They might have oatmeal or waffles again, or a smaller snack like cereal bars and milk.
5-6PM--Dinner--They eat what I cooked, or some version of what I cooked. For example, one evening last week I made Ham Steak with Mustard Cream Sauce, couscous and steamed peas. Both kids ate the ham without sauce, Maureen ate couscous and picked at the peas, Johnny ate the peas and since he does not like couscous, I gave him half a banana too. Plus milk to drink.
Sometimes one or both kids are hungry again before bed, but whether or not they get more food depends on how well they ate dinner and what they are asking for. Kids that picked at their dinner don't get cookies, but kids that still seem genuinely hungry might get dry cereal or a soft pretzel or fruit.
Now, while Maureen is usually a good eater, Johnny has always been pickier. He has gotten much better at trying new foods and textures as he gets older, but he doesn't eat a lot in terms of meal size, and at 7 1/2, he's smaller and skinnier than most of his classmates. Our pediatrician is not worried about his weight, so I try not to be either. But sometimes it's hard not to worry on days when he brings home most of his lunch largely uneaten, or leaves much of his dinner on his plate. However, the Druckerman book has me wondering if I changed the schedule of his meals and snacks, if he might eat more. Or if it really matters how much he eats at designated meal times as long as what he is eating, at whatever time, is healthy and wholesome. On Friday, he was in such a hurry to go meet friends at the playground after school that he passed on his usual snack/mini meal. But once at the playground, he did come up to me more than once to rummage in my bag for food. All I had brought, on purpose, was a small baggie of pretzels and an applesauce pouch, and since it was 85 degrees, water.
We were there for 3 hours and he drank all his water, passed on the applesauce and ate half the pretzels. At home, he did eat dinner with more gusto than usual, but this was only one day of the experiment so I'll have to see how it plays out. I remain convinced though that withholding food so he is theoretically hungrier still won't make him eat mashed potatoes.
What do you think? Does snacking keep your kids from eating at mealtimes? And do you think it matters how much a child eats at a designated mealtime as long as he or she is getting adequate nutrition throughout the day?
Nevertheless, one thing stood out to me: French children don't snack all day long like American children do, and French children eat their meals. I have no idea how much of that is actually true, since picky eating is developmentally normal no matter what your country of origin.
The thing I'm wondering is if this is even reasonable for American children. One late afternoon snack might work if we ate dinner late at night, but we eat dinner usually between 5 and 6PM and the kids are in bed no later than 8PM.
If I had to eat three meals and one snack and that was it, I'd be starving and chewing my own arm off. My days tend to be long. Plus, I exercise 5 days a week and really need to refuel after a workout. Speaking for myself only, if I get to the point where I'm starving, I tend to stuff myself and make less healthy choices. So when I go to work, I fill my bag with small healthy snacks that I can eat between appointments or surgeries. A hardboiled egg, or a whole wheat mini bagel with peanut butter or a bag of grape tomatoes. Especially on days when we're busy and I don't get to eat my actual lunch until wayyyyyy past lunchtime, I depend on those snacks to keep me going.
As for the kids, Maureen is and always has been a good eater. She eats healthy foods, and she is hungry nearly every 60 to 90 minutes. Her usual eating schedule looks something like this:
715AM--Breakfast--oatmeal with cinnamon, or whole wheat pancakes, sometimes a waffle and sausage and very rarely, a bowl of Cheerios
830AM-she starts asking for food again. It's 9 before I finally get her an applesauce pouch and a small cup of juice.
1030AM-she's hungry again, so I give her a string cheese.
1130--Lunch--one hardboiled egg, a bowl of yogurt, milk and some kind of fruit
1230--Preschool snack--fruit again, half a banana or a bag of grapes or apple slices.
3PM--After school snack. Both kids are starving by this point. They might have oatmeal or waffles again, or a smaller snack like cereal bars and milk.
5-6PM--Dinner--They eat what I cooked, or some version of what I cooked. For example, one evening last week I made Ham Steak with Mustard Cream Sauce, couscous and steamed peas. Both kids ate the ham without sauce, Maureen ate couscous and picked at the peas, Johnny ate the peas and since he does not like couscous, I gave him half a banana too. Plus milk to drink.
Sometimes one or both kids are hungry again before bed, but whether or not they get more food depends on how well they ate dinner and what they are asking for. Kids that picked at their dinner don't get cookies, but kids that still seem genuinely hungry might get dry cereal or a soft pretzel or fruit.
Now, while Maureen is usually a good eater, Johnny has always been pickier. He has gotten much better at trying new foods and textures as he gets older, but he doesn't eat a lot in terms of meal size, and at 7 1/2, he's smaller and skinnier than most of his classmates. Our pediatrician is not worried about his weight, so I try not to be either. But sometimes it's hard not to worry on days when he brings home most of his lunch largely uneaten, or leaves much of his dinner on his plate. However, the Druckerman book has me wondering if I changed the schedule of his meals and snacks, if he might eat more. Or if it really matters how much he eats at designated meal times as long as what he is eating, at whatever time, is healthy and wholesome. On Friday, he was in such a hurry to go meet friends at the playground after school that he passed on his usual snack/mini meal. But once at the playground, he did come up to me more than once to rummage in my bag for food. All I had brought, on purpose, was a small baggie of pretzels and an applesauce pouch, and since it was 85 degrees, water.
We were there for 3 hours and he drank all his water, passed on the applesauce and ate half the pretzels. At home, he did eat dinner with more gusto than usual, but this was only one day of the experiment so I'll have to see how it plays out. I remain convinced though that withholding food so he is theoretically hungrier still won't make him eat mashed potatoes.
What do you think? Does snacking keep your kids from eating at mealtimes? And do you think it matters how much a child eats at a designated mealtime as long as he or she is getting adequate nutrition throughout the day?
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2 comments:
I had one picky eater and one omnivore. They both grew up healthy and strong.
My grandkid eats meal, snack, meal, snack, snack, meal, snack. She's very active and muscular and slim.
Summary. I do not think it matters and I believe they should eat when and how much they want, provided it isn't empty calories. Unfortunately once the kid reaches bicycle and allowance age, you cannot count on them to buy healthy snacks all the time, but if the habits are established, they don't od on chocolate too often.
I think you're managing just fine!
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