In a previous post, I mentioned that Johnny's first year of preschool came with a very important goal. The cut off for kindergarten in our state is September 1st and Johnny's birthday is September 2nd. Since he is only one day past the cutoff, he falls into a group of children that could be eligible for "early admission," so we had a decision to make.
Within a few months of starting preschool, our answer was obvious. He will be five years old in two months, and he'll start kindergarten in fall of 2010 at age six.
Redshirting is a term that originally referred to holding a college athlete back from playing in a regular season to allow for an extra year to grow and practice, thus encouraging success. The term is now used to refer to the practice of holding back an age-eligible child from kindergarten for a year, either for physical growth, social or emotional development, or catching up academically.
After much reading, talking to other parents and discussions with Johnny's teachers and pediatrician, we're confident that the decision we have made is the right one for our son. However, we've been questioned about it, so here are the reasons behind our actions.
It's not a childcare problem for us, because I'm mostly at home with the kids anyway. Even if we did start Johnny this fall, I'd still have Maureen at home with me.
All of the schools that we are considering sending him to are full day programs. While my brother and I both attended full day kindergarten, we also had naptime. Kids now have unstructured time in which they can put their heads down if they are tired, but the days of an hour of naptime after lunch are long gone. While I do want him to attend full day kindergarten, I'd rather he do it at age 6 instead of age 5.
Kindergarten is simply harder than it used to be. Many of the activities that Johnny did at preschool this past year were teaching skills that used to be taught in first grade. He would be fine attending the kindergarten I went to all those years ago, but the kindergarten that he will experience is vastly different. According to his preschool teacher, many young kindergartners struggle with the material. In order to address this, most school districts have moved the cutoff date for entry. When I was five, the cutoff was December 31st. It's now September 1st and some states have even moved to a late May cutoff. As a result, the kids are older and more able to handle the material, but there are still a group of kids that are on the young side and may struggle. I suspect that by Christmas, Johnny will be ready for kindergarten. If I was inclined, I could push him this summer to be ready by this fall. But why? So he can start at the "right" age? Once he starts full time school, he'll be there for the next 13 years of his life, not counting college. So what's the rush? What's one more year at home with mom?
Developmentally, Johnny is right where he should be for an almost five-year-old. If he started school this fall, some of his classmates would be 9, 10, 11 months older than him, or some even more than a year older. Why should he be compared to kids that much older?
According to his preschool teacher, as a whole, older students tend to be leaders, while the younger children are the followers. Not that being a follower is something to be ashamed of, and not everyone can be a leader. Some people are just born followers. But in observing Johnny with other kids, one thing is obvious. When he's with older kids, he's a follower. He hangs back and watches to see what they do first, before joining in. When he is one of the older kids, he is the one taking charge, setting the pace, making decisions. We feel that by waiting a year, he will develop according to his natural inclination. There is a big difference between being a follower because that's the way a person is, and being a follower because you're overshadowed by other, more confident people.
While Johnny has never been a shy child and makes friends wherever he goes, he could use an extra year to develop a little more self control and the ability to concentrate, skills that will help him in the more rigorous academic atmosphere when he does start school.
Finally, he does need more time to work on his fine motor skills. I've read many an article that says the focus on academic success in kindergarten had led to a group of children who can read earlier than ever, but that don't know how to use scissors. Johnny was never the kind of kid who wanted to sit and color or do crafts, so I didn't push it. Now, approaching the school age years, he is more interested in those activities, but his fine motor skills need more developing. Blame it on being a first time mom, that it never occurred to me that there are ways of developing those skills that don't involve coloring or crafts, and many of them are activities that Maureen enjoys now.
Someone asked me about the possibility of Johnny being bored if he starts a year later, and I think that's a valid concern. But I also think it's a lot easier to find ways to challenge a child that is advanced academically than it is to navigate the system to find help for a child that is struggling.
The real kicker was the many, many conversations I have had with other moms. While many have told me that they started their child at age 5 and wished they had waited a year, no one has ever told me that they waited a year and then regretted it.
So, there you have it, the reasons behind our decision to "redshirt" our son.
Has anyone else ever been in this position, and how did you handle it?
Within a few months of starting preschool, our answer was obvious. He will be five years old in two months, and he'll start kindergarten in fall of 2010 at age six.
Redshirting is a term that originally referred to holding a college athlete back from playing in a regular season to allow for an extra year to grow and practice, thus encouraging success. The term is now used to refer to the practice of holding back an age-eligible child from kindergarten for a year, either for physical growth, social or emotional development, or catching up academically.
After much reading, talking to other parents and discussions with Johnny's teachers and pediatrician, we're confident that the decision we have made is the right one for our son. However, we've been questioned about it, so here are the reasons behind our actions.
It's not a childcare problem for us, because I'm mostly at home with the kids anyway. Even if we did start Johnny this fall, I'd still have Maureen at home with me.
All of the schools that we are considering sending him to are full day programs. While my brother and I both attended full day kindergarten, we also had naptime. Kids now have unstructured time in which they can put their heads down if they are tired, but the days of an hour of naptime after lunch are long gone. While I do want him to attend full day kindergarten, I'd rather he do it at age 6 instead of age 5.
Kindergarten is simply harder than it used to be. Many of the activities that Johnny did at preschool this past year were teaching skills that used to be taught in first grade. He would be fine attending the kindergarten I went to all those years ago, but the kindergarten that he will experience is vastly different. According to his preschool teacher, many young kindergartners struggle with the material. In order to address this, most school districts have moved the cutoff date for entry. When I was five, the cutoff was December 31st. It's now September 1st and some states have even moved to a late May cutoff. As a result, the kids are older and more able to handle the material, but there are still a group of kids that are on the young side and may struggle. I suspect that by Christmas, Johnny will be ready for kindergarten. If I was inclined, I could push him this summer to be ready by this fall. But why? So he can start at the "right" age? Once he starts full time school, he'll be there for the next 13 years of his life, not counting college. So what's the rush? What's one more year at home with mom?
Developmentally, Johnny is right where he should be for an almost five-year-old. If he started school this fall, some of his classmates would be 9, 10, 11 months older than him, or some even more than a year older. Why should he be compared to kids that much older?
According to his preschool teacher, as a whole, older students tend to be leaders, while the younger children are the followers. Not that being a follower is something to be ashamed of, and not everyone can be a leader. Some people are just born followers. But in observing Johnny with other kids, one thing is obvious. When he's with older kids, he's a follower. He hangs back and watches to see what they do first, before joining in. When he is one of the older kids, he is the one taking charge, setting the pace, making decisions. We feel that by waiting a year, he will develop according to his natural inclination. There is a big difference between being a follower because that's the way a person is, and being a follower because you're overshadowed by other, more confident people.
While Johnny has never been a shy child and makes friends wherever he goes, he could use an extra year to develop a little more self control and the ability to concentrate, skills that will help him in the more rigorous academic atmosphere when he does start school.
Finally, he does need more time to work on his fine motor skills. I've read many an article that says the focus on academic success in kindergarten had led to a group of children who can read earlier than ever, but that don't know how to use scissors. Johnny was never the kind of kid who wanted to sit and color or do crafts, so I didn't push it. Now, approaching the school age years, he is more interested in those activities, but his fine motor skills need more developing. Blame it on being a first time mom, that it never occurred to me that there are ways of developing those skills that don't involve coloring or crafts, and many of them are activities that Maureen enjoys now.
Someone asked me about the possibility of Johnny being bored if he starts a year later, and I think that's a valid concern. But I also think it's a lot easier to find ways to challenge a child that is advanced academically than it is to navigate the system to find help for a child that is struggling.
The real kicker was the many, many conversations I have had with other moms. While many have told me that they started their child at age 5 and wished they had waited a year, no one has ever told me that they waited a year and then regretted it.
So, there you have it, the reasons behind our decision to "redshirt" our son.
Has anyone else ever been in this position, and how did you handle it?
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12 comments:
You shouldn't have to justify your decision to anyone! I'm proud of you for recognizing that Johnny could use a little extra time and are giving that to him.
Fred didn't start kindergarten until he was 6 years old (his birthday is July 15th) as he wasn't quite ready. His parents have never regretted their decision! He ended up being a National Merit Scholar later in life.
I haven't been through this, but I applaud your decision for all of the reasons you listed. I think, with rare exceptions, putting them in younger starts them at a disadvantage. Like you, I have never heard anyone say they wished they hadn't waited a year, but have certainly heard the opposite.
I think its a smart move for a late summer birthday, particularly for a boy. The only place I've ever been criticized for our decision to start J "late" is in online forums from people with little experience with school age kids and no background in education.
Our state considered moving the deadline back to May, but opted not to because they felt it would put a childcare strain on people, (but that argument doesn't mesh for me 100%, because shouldn't those of us with fall babies get government subsidized child care since we have to pay for it anyway if we are working). The big argument in favor was that districts with earlier deadlines have better reading scores. It's too bad that academic success is taking a back seat to parental convenience (since when is having a kid ever convenient, ha!)
I think its smart to wait a year, really what does it hurt and as ahomeschooler , theres so much you could do at home with him this coming year to have him more then ready next year. Then he can learn and grow at his pace and not be frustrated or over whelemd. and that all day kindergarten is hard on young kids- I need a nap:-)-
My kid will probably be one of the younger ones since his birthday is in May, he'll have just turned 5 a few months before school starts. I have a different decision to make. I would love to send him to preschool but the programs here are either part time or cost a rediculous amount of money and I'd still have to pay for daycare. I just plain can't afford it and don't have a way to transport him to and from it so we didn't sign him up. I wonder frequently if I'm doing him a disservice. His daycare provider is great. He's known his abc's since he was 18 months old and is beginning to read all on his own. Still he is very headstrong and sometimes has a hard time following direction if its not what he wants to do. I'm just praying that he'll be able to catch up quickly on whatever it is he's missing out on by not attending preschool. But if schools want kids to attend, they need to make it more affordable and convenient for parents.
Both of my kids were born in November. I didn't agonize over my decision--I simply wasn't ready to give them up yet. Both were five in preschool, six in kindergarten, etc. Yes, they were older than most other kids. They also got their driver's licenses earlier! One has graduated from college and is successfully employed, and the other is a junior in college. My decision to 'redshirt' them mattered not a whit, and I got an extra year with my kids. It goes by so fast. Enjoy your time with your kids. You're one smart mom.
We've talked about this and I have kids on either side of the cutoff (Aug 1st in Indiana, currently). I saw pros and cons with my 9 year old being one of the oldest. My daughter would have been fine either way, so I felt a little like we were holding her back, but with an Oct. birthday, we didn't have a choice. My youngest will probably be one of the younger ones with a June birthday, but being my 3rd child, and knowing the personalities of all my kids I think he will do fine. I guess that is the key, knowing your kid and not feeling bad about the decision.
I have a relative who reshirted her son and I think she regrets it and says makes things a big deal in front of him and I don't think this is going to help him in the long run, just gives him a complex that he seems to take out on younger kids.
Being sure and making it a positive experience will ensure he is fine.
Technically, you've not red-shirted him. His birthday is Sept. 2nd. You just did not opt for early admission available to children for whom waiting a year would be detrimental.
Anon--technically, no. He's one day too young. But many people have felt the need to tell us that because it's only one day, we should push for early admission so he can start "on time." And rather than explain our reasons over and over again, instead I wrote this blog post.
My sister is keeping her son out a year because she doesn't think he is ready for Kindergarten. I'm sure that you know your kid as well.
I have known a few parents who kept their boys from starting earlier, so that they would be better at SPORTS! That just blows my mind.
My husband was one of the oldest in his class. His mom would talk about how he "should" have been in the earlier class. I don't think it would have bothered him if she hadn't said it that way. And, his birthday isn't until the end of October.
we are redshirting our boy as well. He did kindergarten at Montessori, and is reading at a 2nd grade level, but the maturity is not there. I want him to be the oldest, not the youngest, for sure. It's not a problem for me. I'm just praying he's not bored.
Excellent choice - you and your husband are the experts on your child - everyone else is just someone to consult and then you make your educated decision.
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