Book Review: Marley and Me

After a lifetime as an animal lover and pet owner, and fifteen years working in the animal care industry, most breeds of dogs fall into one of two categories. The first is dogs I like, such as setters, pitbulls, French bull dogs and Boston terriers. The second is dogs I would never own, such as cocker spaniels, rottweilers and sharpeis. There is only one dog that appears on both lists, and that is the Labrador Retriever. Before the kids were born, John and I owned a sailboat and spent a lot of time on the water. John decided it would be a good idea to get a Lab, since they are water dogs. His choice of breed was based on the one Lab he had known, the uncommonly calm pet of a friend.

Labs are beautiful dogs. They’re strong and loyal and stoic and friendly. They’re also extremely energetic, difficult to train, frequently over exuberant and prone to being destructive. In short, they're big, sweet boneheads.

Last year, while shopping for a book on toddler sleep, I spotted Marley and Me: Life and Love With The World's Worst Dog by John Grogan on a table and was immediately drawn to it because of the picture of the yellow lab on the front. Last March, I purchased the book for my grandmother, and then ended up bringing it home from Michigan after her Memorial Service.

If you're an animal lover, you will love this book, and if you have any experience with crazy dogs, you'll love it even more.

John Grogan and his wife, Jenny, are newlyweds living in Florida. They decide to get a dog as "practice" for a baby, and end up with a yellow bundle of fur that they name Marley. Their choice of breed is based on dogs that they had as children, and that's about it. They learn--too late--that Marley's father was one of those crazed labs you hear about, and embark on a life with a slightly psychotic, neurotic, destructive maniac with a heart of gold. In between chewing up furniture, shredding door frames, eating jewelry and freaking out over thunderstorms, Marley lives his life with a complete and utter joy I've only seen in dogs and children. He jumps into pools, runs pellmell down beaches and plays fetch with abandon. He is there for the happiest and saddest moments of the Grogan family's life. His owners alternate between wondering what life would be like without him (no saliva on the furniture, no half eaten shoes, no broken screen doors, no landmines in the yard) and wondering how they would live without him (no sloppy dog kisses, no crazily wagging tail, no wild sled rides, no steadfast loyalty).

Grogan has a breezy writing style that flows easily, and his descriptions of cleaning up Marley's messes left me convulsed with laughter, especially since a lot of the things Marley did, my dog also did. The chapter in which Marley swallows the necklace was so funny, I laughed out loud. The lengths he went to in order to retrieve his wife's gift were disgusting but absolutely hilarious. Marley's behavior following Jenny's miscarriage and the births of her three babies made me smile through tears because I strongly believe that animals can sense human emotion and know when you need a furry hug. No household is complete without a pet, and even after reading about adventures in Marley-Land, we will probably get a dog some day.

As for the criticism's Grogan has received for his book, I don't find any of them to be founded on truth.

First of all, this is not a children's book and it was not marketed as such. Yes, it is about a family dog, but 'pet story' doesn't automatically translate into 'kid's story.' There is a description of a miscarriage and Grogan does use some curse words and adult humor, especially with regard to having the dog neutered. One reviewer said he thought the book was more about the Grogan's sex life than their dog, but I disagree. Grogan's narrative on family life after the birth of a baby is right on, and there is nothing raunchy or disgusting. Instead, the Grogan's love for each other is apparent and sex is treated as nothing more than a natural part of a loving and committed relationship.

Many reviewers criticized the Grogan's treatment of Marley with respect to his training, calling him a 'bad dog owner' and an animal abuser. If the reviewers had read the book a little more closely, they would have seen that Grogan does NOT 'kick his dog in the chest' and that if he is guilty of anything, it's following the advice of dog trainers. For the record the advice, a swift knee to the dog's chest when he jumped on people, is advice trainers have been giving for decades, and is, incidentally, the exact same method my family used to cure our pitbull from jumping on people. A method that was recommended by a dog trainer. I've seen some horrible cases of animal abuse and neglect in the 15 years I've been working with animals, and believe me, this is not it.

Also, I wonder if Grogan's critics actually have any experience with dogs that are afraid of thunderstorms. Thunderstorm anxiety is one of the hardest behavior problems to deal with, and even sedatives don't always work. An oral medication takes so long to take effect that the storm is often over with by the time the drugs kick in. Even a meteorologist can't predict thunderstorms 100% of the time, so expecting the Grogans to do it is insane. Is it horrible and mean to lock a dog in a ventilated, destruction-proof garage on those occasions that the owner needs to leave the house? I don't think so, and as the family spent thousands of dollars repairing or replacing things that Marley destroyed, I think they showed admirable patience with their dog's problems. Could they have done things better or differently? Of course, but that also applies to probably 99% of dog owners. Some of the worst behaved animals I have known have belonged to dog groomers and veterinarians. A dog's behavior is not always a reflection of his owner.

Finally, I question the priorities of some of the reviewers. Is it fair to deny a family vacation to three little kids because the dog will need to be boarded? Is is reasonable to put a dog through a major surgery that will cost thousands of dollars when the dog is already thirteen years old and the vet has already said it's not a good idea? Can a stranger make a judgement on when an animal should be euthanized? Unless those individuals were in the Grogan household, they don't have any real insight into Marley's quality of life and have no business questioning the Grogan's decisions regarding Marley's treatment. What comes through loud and clear is the family's love for their crazy pet and that they did the best they could to make life enjoyable for all involved. Too many people would have dumped Marley back with the breeder, or worse yet, in a shelter or on the side of the road, but this family did what I can only admire. They took responsibility for their animal, even when he was messy, smelly, destructive, annoying or inconvenient, and that is a lesson a lot of pet owners need to learn.